There’s no such thing as balance.

Photo by Nelly Volkovich

It’s that age-old bloggers lament – “I haven’t posted in ages!” And there are a million excuses that you can give, but the reality is that sometimes, especially if you’re not yet making a living out of it, something has to give.

And for me, right now, trying to fit in working full time, studying (I’m really supposed to be writing a paper on Crohn’s disease right now), being a wife, keeping a home, being a mom to a very active and funny 21 month old boy, keeping everyone fed and happy, figuring out how to grow a business and finding a bit of time for myself is a challenge. Yes, it’s challenging being a mom. I’m not complaining or going into stereotypical mom mode of “how does anyone get anything done around here?”. I’m lucky that these are my dilemmas, my challenges.

But it makes me question the articles I see in women’s press like ‘how to find balance’ or ‘how to do it all’ (that old stereotype) or ‘finding work-life balance’.

It’s impossible.

The reality is that there might be one day, one week even when everything balances out and you feel like you’re winning at life!

But more often than not, there will be times when work becomes more important and you need to spend every evening catching up on email or you might miss a few bedtimes that week. Then there are other times when you need to put everything into your family life, times when your child is sick, they’re going through a developmental leap and really, really need you as a point of stability or you need to have time with your husband so that you still have a marriage.

All of this is okay. It’s okay not to be perfect. It’s okay not to have a balanced life. As long as you see the woods for the trees and know when things getting too tough, too overwhelming, then that’s what I would call success.

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  1. Love this! A few years ago I was working, studying (both full time) and a single Mum and always so stressed! For some reason I started thinking about myself as a role model for my daughters – was this the life I wanted for them? NO! Several years later I have a less stressful job and feel able to say ‘no’ to overtime, I study occasionally, but only if I want and when I want and part-time. I manage to fit other stuff in when I can without beating myself up too much about missing this and that. It took a lot of reflection and some pain (re finding job etc.) But was well worth it – so happy!

    Posted 6.1.15 Reply